The Zoo

we went to the national zoo on tuesday.

it was 96 degrees and very sunny.

we walked for 4 hours and saw everything that was open. much of the zoo was closed due to rennovations (this isn't the big zoo season yet)

Mandolin loved the monkeys the best.

last year i couldn't have walked around for 4 hours and been the happy person i was yesterday. mandolin and my guy couldn't keep up with me.

we put a lot of sunblock on and drank a lot of fluids, so we were a little tired, nothing bad happened. We didn't snap at each other, we didn't fight, and it was a day full of laughter.

It's shocking the difference 60lbs will make in a body. there were some people struggling around the zoo, and when i saw them, i was constantly reminded to thank myself and anyone else who helped me lose 60lbs, that i am no longer that person who struggles after 4 hours of hiking around places. I too can be a happy tourist (except i still hate crowds)

Here are a few pictures. I think i need to set up one of those online photo books because i have too many pics to share here.

enging march and starting april

these are pics from one of the big snows we had this winter

So tonight mandolin came up to me and said "mommy, I gotta potty." She then took her pullup off, got on the toilet and went pee. We've been potty training for over 9 months and this is a major break-through. I wanted to cry. We wiped, flushed, washed hands, put our pants back on and then got a jelly bean to celebrate. If we get her trained by the time she's 3, she can go to real school. If not, it's homeschooling for her. If she isn't potty trained, she'll only be allowed in the special ed class, and she's too high functioning to be in that class, so homeschooling is the best option until she's potty trained. I'm so proud of her tonight I felt some real hope that I needed to feel.

In other news, I'm starting week 3 of running. There are 9 weeks. I think I can do this. If I finish, I'm getting the over-priced c25k t-shirt that states I was a completer.

My crack whore cousin is having a birthdya party on 4/3 for her kid but sent invitation on 3/31. Who does that? Well, crack whores apparently. I'm not going. We're going to an Easter egg hunt as a family for Mandolin. I'll mail the kid a present next week.

Next weekend I'm meeting an online weight-loss buddy for lunch on Sunday and going to my nephew's 8th britday part on saturday. They live 2 hours away now and it's going to be a pain in my butt to go. There won't be anything I can eat and there's going to be a ton of people I can't stand. I have many issues with my older sister right now. I just don't understand why someone would WANT to live with a man that beats them and teaches her kids that her nickname is "fat whore." It's beyond me.

My two best friends are leaving got Thailand Saturday/Sunday and they'll be gone for about 28 days. I wish them luck. They've NEVER had Thai food, so they're in for a surprise. My dream $5,000 a person trip isn't to Thailand, but that's just me. This trip has caused issues amongst our friendship. The one friend who is going owes me and my guy about $3,000 and is going oon a $5,000 trip. You do the math and guess how long our friendship is going to last when they get back. She owes a lot of people money, but she'd alreayd paid for the trip when it all caught up to her.

$5,000 is tuition for private school for a year for my daughter. I wouldn't take a $5,000 trip knowing that I could give my daughter the gift of a better school. But then again, that's why I have good credit. We don't take fancy trips, own fancy cars, buy expensive clothing etc. We live in our means and pay off our debt as much as possible. It's harder this year because I'm not working and this person has decided to go on a trip rather than take care of her obligations.

I explained to her time and again that if you owe people money (no matter who it is a person or a large company) and don't pay it, then you're STEALING. If there's ever "extra" money in your account, it isn't yours, and if you spend that "extra" you're stealing because you just bounced a check. Some people really need to get hit with bad things to get it together.

I think it's out of my hands. We talked several times about the hardship she's causing others but I haven't seen her seem to care. She didn't apologise or even tell me "thank you" for not suing her etc. I talked to the other friend in our circle, and she'd tired of it too. It's not just the money, it's the carefree attitude about how her poor choices impacting others.

We were hanging out looking at shoes. I haven't bought shoes in months. I don't really need new shoes and it'd be a waste of income to buy something i don't need. I'm not havinga pity party, it's just the truth that when I had a job, I could go buy things on a whim and not worry. I can't now. She needed new shoes for her trip. I bit my tongue about her oweing me money, since a store wasn't the place to throw down about it, but THEN the bitch had the nerve to say "Aren't you going to get anything." I almost hit her in the face with a clog. You don't ask someone you owe $3,000 to why they aren't buying anything! You thank them for understanding why you need fancy walking shoes that are $50 when you owe them both your kidneys and a right leg and then buy your shoes fast and leave.

a "friendly" Family competition

Standard Entry Form

Whichever female can find the worst piece of sh*t excuse for a man and cohabitate, possibly marry (introducing him as your fiance for 35 years doesn't count as married, but you do get some points for a "real" lack of committment), and breed as many times as possible makes it to the final round.

You win, if and ONLY if, your (in)significant other is proven to be the WORST possible mate/parent this generation has seen.

Here's how to play:

Find a jerk. A real pig here, not just a minor pig, but an out-and-out a$$hole. Be warned that not just any jerk will do. There are levels to these things.

I.
Points are awarded for financial strains on the family caused by: negative credit record, bankruptcy, foreclosure, him pawning your stuff (double bonus points are awarded if he pawned it because of alcohol, drug, gambling, or issues with another woman).

Bonus points are awarded for his time spent unemployed, "on disability," and for crippling conditions like drug addiction, alcoholism, or gambling debts. Lastly, points are given out for a criminal record, and you get more points for the longer it is.

II.
Note, it's a must that:
1) he is abusive in some way or another. After the first three incidents of abuse, you may apply for bonus points, but you must fil out form W3-J7 with an adendum.
2) he ruins every "happy" occasion in your time together.
3) he cares more about his mother than you and your kids. However, if you have proof that he's scr3wed his momma over like you, you may fill out form W4-J8 with an adendum to receive triple bonus points.

III.
Double bonus points are awared for concrete proof (not just suspicion or heresay) that he's cheated on you. These points become "maxed out" if he knocks the other woman up, if she's jailbait, or if it's done in your house and you caught them. In short, you could quadruple points here.

IV.
Children:
1) You will be given 10 points for the first child, but 30 points for each additional child. Let's get real, ANYONE can have a kid with an a$$hole, but it takes someone special to have several kids with one.
2) You may receive bonus points if you can prove your kids are messed up because of his influence or lack thereof. Request form W9-Z2 with sub sections QR3WS-QR6WS for the doctors to fill out
3) Points are awarded for him owing back child support, missing important events in the child's life, and if he really has no idea what the kid looks like or how old s/he is you can apply for quadruple points seek out form V7MX3.

V.
1) The competition officially ends when one (in)significant other is found so vial, the rest of the women give in and admit defeat. However, sitting around and b*tching about your spouse and saying "at least I'm not married to X's spouse" does not count as a defeat and if these incidents can be proven, will add points for the person who was mentioned in the catty comment.
2) In the case of a tie, deciding factors will be based on the next relationship the two women have, because let's face it folks, who can stop at just one a$$hole?

VI.
So, what do you win?
1)You win the rights to be the most put-upon b*tch in the family in the generation. This means that no one is allowed to fvck with you at family events. Everyone must side with you because you're the most bitter, angry myrtar in the generation and you HAVE NOTHING TO SHOW FOR IT! Good for you.
2)Oh, and you're always guarenteed a chair. You know chairs are short at family functions, and you? You get a THRONE (not the one in the bathroom) where you may sit and whine for the entire event while telling all the other women what a$$holes they have, and you should know because you married the king of them....

----
I married a good man, so I don't get to play

some march pictures

here're some pictures from the past 2 weeks.

This is mandolin sitting on her crib

Successful shopping/free ride

Waiting at the Drs office on monday. notice our packed lunch in the green bag? yep, i've become THAT organized and am now one of THOSE mothers...

Riding in the car today on our way to go running. Notice the dirty brownie face? Yep, that's my kid.

good man

I was reminded today what a good man I have. Back in the fall, we were deeply saddened to hear that one of my guy's students had passed away from cancer. This was a nice young man who had suffered from brain cancer for three years. My husband had had his older brother (who is currently in his 3rd year at college). The school asked the community to help pay for the funeral costs, as most people do not take out life insurance on their children and funerals are expensive. We did what we could and gave what we could for the family. I felt terrible for this woman. My husband had the eldest son during his first year of teaching. The kid was acting out and cried a lot in class. Worried, my husband arranged his first ever parents-teacher conference. The mother explained that her husband was about to die from brain cancer and it was hard to deal with her sons. They were in all sorts of grief counseling, but things were hard. When the husband was diagnosed, they said he'd be just fine, but after 8 years, they were waiting for him to die. I can't imagine being 14 and all I ever knew bout my dad revolved around watching him die. Not too long after the father passed away, the youngest son was diagnosed with the same cancer, except there weren't any "you'll be fines" attached. They pretty much knew he was going to die and spent 3 years waiting for it to happen.

Recently, this woman contacted my guy. She confessed to him that at least once a day, she finds herself breaking down and thinking that she can't go on. After losing her youngest child and husband within 5 years, she's decided to go after her dreams. She's back in school and can't use a computer at ALL. She remembered my guy, and made an appointment to see him and went and asked for his help so she can get through school. What did he do? He helped her. This man is busy between working, PhD school, working more, owning our business, grading papers, and lesson plans etc. But part of him said "screw that" and he took precious time he barely has to help a woman at her wits end. I'm amazed that she thought of my guy, but happy she did. I'd like to think that if my guy wasn't around, and i reached out to someone for help, they'd help me too.

3 for $51

I haven't really wanted to buy a lot of clothing as I've been losing weight, because I hope to never wear it again. I needed 2-3 dressed for occasions coming up.

We're going out for out anniversary in april, prom may 1st and family picture in march.

There's a consignment shop not too far away from me in a nice neighborhood where all the Raven's players wive's take their old stuff. None of these women are large, so i've been in, I was never really able to shop for me.

Knowing I needed to get 3 dresses that I may never wear again, I decided to check this shop out. I am currently a size 10. It's not big nor is it small, it's a nice medium size.

We found many nice dresses and I for a long black number foe the anniversary, a burgundy thing for the prom (it's more modest), and a pretty sunday sundress for the family pic. I took pics of me in the formal dresses and I'll share those now.

humdrum and stupidity

not much is going on with me. I'm down 57 lbs and feeling good. I now wear a size 10 and have started to buy all new clothing. i'm not done with the whole "taking care of me" thing, but we're getting close. next saturday i have to go buy a prom dress for prom on may 1st. my guy has decided that instead of celebrating our anniversary in april and then prom may 1st, we'll do both on may 1st. i foresee a terrible night and some fighting because of this, but he swears it's a good idea. i love him, but it's not a good idea. if he thinks that being a prom chaperone is how i want to spend my anniversary, he's nuts. do i want to go? sure. is it a good substitute for taking me on a dinner cruise of the chesapeake bay? hell no. my biggest issue here is that prom's at a hotel this year. it's usually at halls but not hotels to discourage private parties upstairs. there are many aprents who don't have a problem with gettinga few hotel rooms and booze and hanving it to their kids as long as they're not "drinking and driving" it's okay. it's a stupid mindset, but people are stupid. go figure. i don't want a room in the same hotel as 400 drunk horny teens that my husband was babysitting earlie in the night (they have to babysit because at homecoming they caught 2 kids literall fucking on the dancefloor with a group of kids standing around them watching and trying to keep the adults unaware of the situation).
sure if prom ends at 12 and something goes down upstairs at 1, he won't tecnically be reposnible for contacting people, but let's be serious. they can have as many sober after prom parties as they want, and provide all the transportation they want to siad party from the prom, but if they had the opportunity to ditch the sober part and go drinking upstairs in a hotel room, many of those kids would. when it's at a hall, the kids HAVE to leave when prom is over. However, if it's at a hotel, good luck getting them to get on a bus and go to a lock-in back at the school.