Tomorrow I go back to water aerobics for the first time in like 6 or 7 weeks. I am not looking forward to it because I've been slacking in my personal fitness recently andknow Wednesday will bring PAIN. On friday it was 58 degrees outside, so Mandolin and I went on a walk/run around a local lake. It took us about 45 minutes to do the complete path, and we finished at the same time as some people who started jogging when we did, so I think we made good time. I had on my ipod and was in my special zone and Mandolin was in her stroller while we zoomed along. I challenged myself to run up and down every hill we met, and by the end of the circuit, I'd completed my challenge. It felt nice to accomplish a goal. If it's nice this week, we'll do it again, but I'm going to try to run longer distances than just up and down. My new bra isn't a jogging bra, so I need to get a new sports bra if we're really going to give this running crap a real try. Mandolin loved seeing the ducks, geese, swans, and other wildlife. We went in the morning, so many people were out walking dogs and some other stay-at-home moms were taking their kids around the lake too and then to the baby playground next to it after.
I've been seriously thinking about joining a parenting group. My issue is that the moms are either furry hippy chicks or mean plastic fake women like the the women on the various "house wives" shows on TV. I'm too mean to hang with the furry hippies, but I'm not mean enough for the fakers, so I don't really fit in with either group. I did think about one of the support groups for mothers of children with disabilities, but most of their kids have profound disabilities and would look at my "struggles" as a walk in the park and I wouldn't fit in there either. It's hard to make new friends.
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It IS hard to make new friends. I went years without making new friends except for people I met at work. Then I joined my drum corps, and my life has literally changed. I know how cliche and stupid that sounds, but it really did. I went from having almost no social life to being invited to parties, meeting lots of new people, and doing something challenging and fun with my little bit of extra time. It is so good for my overall well-being to have found a group of people I enjoy. Maybe you can find a knitting group or another local group with some of your same interests. It's awkward and uncomfortable at first, but then, so are most new things and situations. Best of luck to you!
ReplyDeleteJilly, my experience was that being a stay-at-home mom was a pretty isolating experience. (Of course, we moved every year or two, so when I DID manage to meet people, I had to leave them.)
ReplyDeleteI made some of my favorite friends at playgroups and babysitting co-ops. Why don't you consider starting one?
I literally went door to door in our neighborhood in Roscoe, Illinois because I was desperate. I had a 2 year old and a brand new baby and literally did not know a single person! Not even one! I met three ladies with new babies. We formed a playgroup and met every week for the 3 years I lived there, taking turns at each other's houses. We had a potluck lunch, playtime, and if we were lucky, they'd all fall asleep and we could chat the afternoon away. I'm still in touch with some of those friends, and the "babies" are 24 now.
VQ
Most of my neighbors are old and have adult children, well except for the fat naked lesbians that jump on the trampoline, but they live with their parents, who are old. two families do have children in school, but the kids are in middle and high school. also, i'm the only stay-at-home mom on the block. my neighbors own a daycae that we send mandolin to once a week, but they're busy with their business.
ReplyDeletei think my best bet is to give in and see about one of the mom groups for kids with disabilities. they'll at least understand some of the stupid crap we've had to go through, but their experiences will probably be worse. i really don't want to join the vapid bitches that have play dates at the indoor playground, and lord help me if i have to spend time with the hemp wearing women who all have ratty hair etc. the first time someone lectured me on what i feed my kid or how i parent, i'd have to hit someone with my shoe.
i should probably see when play time at the library is during the week, that should be a good start.
thanks jenny and verb